2009 in a nutshell

January:

My 19th birthday (and getting stranded on the side of interstate 40)
Trips to Wilmington
second semester at Meredith
SNOW!!!!
Jamie found out she was pregnant with Charlie. :)

February:
Nana and PawPaw's 50th wedding anniversary party
Spring Break spent in bed with a bad case of the flu
Jeff Corwin came to Meredith

March:
Naam's birthday and movie party
Still taking trips to Wilmington.
The month in which I THINK Ally and John started dating....could have been February
Josh Gracin concert

April:
Fire and Water Dinner
Music Man
I went on Crutches for my knee
Shopping Trip and photoshoot with Lizzie, Sarah, and Jess

May:
Matthew's race
The Smothers Brothers
Semester ended
Figured out what I did to my knee and started treatment
Sarah's wedding

June:
Field of Dreams weekend
Summer swim meets start
Shopping trips with Lizzie and Sarah
Week in Richmond helping grandma Barbara move

July:
Seahawks have another undefeated season!!!!!
Sound of Music at Memorial Auditorium
Fun Meet and swim team banquet
Tales of the Kingdom summer theatre camp

August:
William and Jamie's baby shower
End of season water polo and swimming 2 week session
Father/Daughter Dance
School Starts up again
The Getty's show

September:
Contra dancing!!!!
William and Jenn's wedding
Declared my major
Sleepover with Jess
Red Jumpsuit Apparatus show

October:
Mary Katherine's 14th Birthday
Charlie is born!
A Day at Abigail's. :)
BA homecoming
NC State Fair with the best friends.

November:
Village Night
Cornhuskin' in which the sophomore class beat out the juniors!!!!! :)
Blind Side movie with Katrina and Jennifer
Hokies win the UVA/VT game....again. :)
Barn Dance

December:
TSO concert
Phantom of the Opera
Christmas with the family
Emily's 16th birthday celebration extraveganza

It's been an amazing year!!!!!! I can only hope 2010 is as awesome!
New Years Eve at Lizzie's. :)

Psalm 104

Praise the LORD, O my soul.
O LORD my God, you are very great;
you are clothed with splendor and majesty.

He wraps himself in light as with a garment;
he stretches out the heavens like a tent
and lays the beams of his upper chambers on their waters.
He makes the clouds his chariot
and rides on the wings of the wind.

He makes winds his messengers,
flames of fire his servants.
He set the earth on its foundations;
it can never be moved.

You covered it with the deep as with a garment;
the waters stood above the mountains.
But at your rebuke the waters fled,
at the sound of your thunder they took to flight;
they flowed over the mountains,
they went down into the valleys,
to the place you assigned for them.

You set a boundary they cannot cross;
never again will they cover the earth.

He makes springs pour water into the ravines;
it flows between the mountains.
They give water to all the beasts of the field;
the wild donkeys quench their thirst.
The birds of the air nest by the waters;
they sing among the branches.

He waters the mountains from his upper chambers;
the earth is satisfied by the fruit of his work.

He makes grass grow for the cattle,
and plants for man to cultivate—
bringing forth food from the earth:
wine that gladdens the heart of man,
oil to make his face shine,
and bread that sustains his heart.

The trees of the LORD are well watered,
the cedars of Lebanon that he planted.
There the birds make their nests;
the stork has its home in the pine trees.

The high mountains belong to the wild goats;
the crags are a refuge for the coneys.
The moon marks off the seasons,
and the sun knows when to go down.

You bring darkness, it becomes night,
and all the beasts of the forest prowl.
The lions roar for their prey
and seek their food from God.

The sun rises, and they steal away;
they return and lie down in their dens.
Then man goes out to his work,
to his labor until evening.

How many are your works, O LORD!
In wisdom you made them all;
the earth is full of your creatures.

There is the sea, vast and spacious,
teeming with creatures beyond number—
living things both large and small.
There the ships go to and fro,
and the leviathan, which you formed to frolic there.

These all look to you
to give them their food at the proper time.

When you give it to them,
they gather it up;
when you open your hand,
they are satisfied with good things.

When you hide your face,
they are terrified;
when you take away their breath,
they die and return to the dust.

When you send your Spirit,
they are created,
and you renew the face of the earth.

May the glory of the LORD endure forever;
may the LORD rejoice in his works-
he who looks at the earth, and it trembles,
who touches the mountains, and they smoke.

I will sing to the LORD all my life;
I will sing praise to my God as long as I live.
May my meditation be pleasing to him,
as I rejoice in the LORD.
But may sinners vanish from the earth
and the wicked be no more.

Praise the LORD, O my soul.
Praise the LORD.

Learning to be content

One thing most people should know about me is that I am NOT a person who enjoys change. This week was no exception. I love snow, but unfortunately Raleigh didn't get more than an inch. This meant, however, that Virginia got a TON. Particularly where my cousins live in Manakin-Sabot. As of last night, they had 2 feet. Because of this little snow problem, it meant a change of plans. Our annual family Christmas party was last night. Because we don't have a four-wheel drive vehicle, like my Aunt Betsy, and we're not going to rent one like my Aunt Martha did, Daddy decided we would not be attending this years party.

For a few hours, I struggled with a lot of emotions. I finally realized that I could either let this setback ruin my weekend, or I could try and make it a fun weekend despite the setback. So I convinced my parents (who hate ballet) to go to Field of Dream's production of The Nutcracker. It was a VERY fun night. The ballet was fantastic. One of my friends, Matt, played piano during intermission, and was amazing as usual. Afterwards, we all stood around talking, and Lizzie and I decided to start singing since they do it in musicals all the time, and we thought it was time we were part of a real life musical. :)

Jessica rode with me from my house, so when we drove back we sat outside in the bed of my truck (in the cold) and had lots of deep conversations. And of course, one prank call (sorry, Neil!!!!). I love deep conversations. Somehow, I think they're a necessary part of life. All that to say is that this weekend wasn't entirely ruined... in fact, I think it might have been better than going to Virginia. I have the best friends in the entire world. I don't know what I would do without Lizzie, Sarah, Kara, Matt, Nathan, Jess....and everyone else that I'm leaving out. :P

Thoughts on relationships, love, and flirting

I've been pondering this a lot lately. I've made some mistakes in my life when it's come to guys....most girls have. I, being the typical teenage fool of a girl, fell for a boy when I was about 14. That lasted until I was 18, believe it or not. Then I had a random...well, I guess it's best to call it a rebound summer with another guy. Nuff said on that one. I learned a lot throughout this whole situation. The entire time I was "in love", or whatever you so chose to call it, I realized a few things. The first is that I learned how much time I had taken away from God, and put into this guy. It became almost an idolatry thing for me. And I realized that a lot of relationships are like this, if you don't constantly check yourself and make sure god is the head still.

The rest of what I learned ties into a lot of what I've been thinking recently. I've watched as several of my close friends lately have either ended a relationship, or had their respective boyfriends or girlfriends call the relationship off. And I've seen the pain, and I remember the pain that I went through. And the more I see it, the more I realize that it's pointless....God created our heart for one person. Not for multiple. So when we're constantly "falling" for guys or girls, slowly we're giving away pieces of our hearts. A lot of times, this occurs without knowing whether or not the respective person is interested...and more likely than not, they aren't. It's like an illustration a guy I know used one time when talking about this. Say you have a nametag, one of those sticky ones. And you stick it on your shirt once, and then remove it. It's still sticky enough to use again. But the more you do this, the less sticky it becomes. Until it's hard to make it stay anywhere. This is what giving part of your heart away is like.

I'm not saying this path is easy to follow. NOT liking a guy is significantly harder than liking a guy, I know. But though it's the path less traveled, and takes significantly more work to do, it's a less thorny path. Now don't get legalistic with this, in that you can never like a guy ever. But like Jane Austen said in Northanger Abbey: " for if it be true, as a celebrated writer has maintained, that no young lady can be justified in falling in love before the gentleman's love is declared, it must be very improper that a young lady should dream of a gentleman before the gentleman is first known to have dreamt of her."

Onto my views on flirting. This is something that has annoyed me for years. I've always disliked it when people flirt, particularly when the flirting isn't returned, and it's obvious that the (typically) girl is throwing themselves at the guy (typically....sometimes this is reversed). But after a conversation with Lizzie (what are best friends for?) I've realized that even so much as singling another person out over others can have the same vibe as flirting. It's not as severe, but it is still a form of flirting. And the only time this should occur is when the person in question is serious about starting a relationship.

Once again, I have to caution against taking this to the extreme. I have quite a few guy friends, I always have. But there's a difference between having guy friends, talking to them, and spending time with them, and flirting. When it's evident that they are the first person you go to before your girlfriends, especially if you are not related to them or they are not your boyfriend/fiance/husband, then there is a slight problem there. And I think this is where so many girls and guys end up getting their heartbroken.

Into the Wild

We had to watch a movie in class and write an in-class essay. This is the one I wrote, and I figured I'd post it. :)


Chris's Values and our Culture:

As I watched Into the Wild, I almost saw myself in the film. I could see how each person in the movie is influenced by culture, and how much environment can influence their actions and decisions. Chris had many ideals and values, but his aim in life was to influence the culture of today. The primary three things that he tried to impress upon the youth culture of today was the value of happiness, the value of selflessness, and the ideal of being willing to take risks.

Happiness takes a huge role in this movie. When the movie begins, Chris believes that he can be perfectly happy on his own. He even makes the statement that you don’t need human relationships to make you happy, that God puts happiness all around us. His view of happiness slowly changes as he grows in this show. He realizes that while he might not need others happiness at first, that they need his. He realizes by the end of the movie that his view on happiness was so wrong, as seen in his journal. He writes an entry a few days before he dies, and says that “Happiness is only real when shared.” This teaches a huge lesson to the youth of today’s culture. A lot of times, today’s youth do not realize what happiness they have. They don’t realize that, even though things might be rough, they have happiness if they are just willing to accept the people around them and realize that they have faults.

Today’s youth need to learn the value of selflessness as well. From the day Chris began college, he started down a path of selflessness. He took classes in the politics of third-world countries and the food crisis in these countries. He realizes through these classes that there is a much simpler way to live. Chris does take this to the extreme by burning all his money and destroying his car, but I believe he has a message in that as well. He’s showing us that sometimes it is necessary to do something this drastic in order to get people’s attention, and to experience what real selflessness is like. He tells his former boss that things are way easier and not as fun when he has money in his pockets, which goes to show that it would be beneficial to be selfless.

We do not come from a society of risk-takers. From the moment you’re born, you’re taught to play it safe. Never touch the stove, always cross at the crosswalk, and don’t leave the yard. As you grow older, this only gets worse as you’re told to always study so you can have great grades, go to college so you can get a better job, and the list goes on. Chris defies the rule of playing it safe. He does get a college degree, but he never ends up using that degree. He instead destroys everything he has and sets off on the biggest adventure of his life. During one of his stops on the way, he tells an elderly gentleman who becomes like his grandfather that he needs to be willing to take risks, and to get off his butt to see the world. This is a concept that every person can apply to their lives.

While it is true that Chris takes things to the extreme, he has some very valuable lessons that can be taught to the youth today. He teaches them about true happiness, selflessness, and taking risks. As a youth in today’s culture, I learned a lot by watching Chris. I can only hope that he continues to reach out to others through this movie. After all, as he told the elderly grandfather figure, “People just need to change the way they look at things.”

Weekend excitement and other such thoughts

This weekend was really fun!! On thursday night (Yes, I'm starting my weekend there), my fabulous freshman year roomate, Ally, and my amazing friend Nora had their synchronized swimming show. They were both AMAZING!!!!! The show was fun. John-John (ally's bf) was late (coughcough) but since he's a cop and had to work later, it's ok. It was great to see them, and the show was fun. Afterwards, we went across the street to beansprout for some late-night food.

Friday was fun. I spent the morning doing a case on abortion, and we only made it through the first of 7 points. hahahha. :P Then afterwards, I came home, took a nap, and did some homework and chores. I went with mom and dad to hear Wade Taylor speak...he basically reminds me of my granddaddy's best friend, John Arvelo. He's a fantastic speaker, and has some great theology.

I went to Meredith Saturday afternoon and picked up my friend Abigail, drove back to her house, and rode with all but 2 of her family members allll the way up to gorgeous VA and the Alexander's fantastic house!! They were having a barn dance, and it was so much fun! Meredith, your farm is PERFECT for that, and the loft was amazing for dancing. Though I must admit, the caller made things a tad complicated sometimes. :P BUT we did dance a few rounds of the Virginia Reel...I haven't danced that since I was knee-high to a grasshopper (ok, maybe not THAT small, but still), so it was a ton of fun. After an adventurous car ride home, I spent the night at Abigail's, and then went to church this morning. Afterwards I came home and yes, I did end up taking a much-needed nap...I figured the homework could wait. :)

The semester is starting to wind down...there's only 10 more days of actual school!!! I have several projects that need to be finished...yikes! I am very happy this semester is winding down...I need that month-long break. too many papers and stuff have been due this semester.

This next week will be slightly busy...I have poem recitations, papers, projects, and tests. And on friday, I have a photoshoot with the fabulous Christi Ann photography. I've known Christi since....we were 10 or so, so I am super excited. :)

I'm gonna leave y'all with my latest song addiction. This is "Things I Don't Understand" by Coldplay...they are fantastic, and the song is (fairly) true. Check it out. :) Later! Things I Don't Understand

thoughts right now

There's a lot of things running through my mind tonight. Rather than try to explain them all, I'm going to list a couple song lyrics and how they are applying to my life right now.

"Evens rock. Evens roll. Evens rock and evens roll and evens rock and roll." Yes, we swept CORN!!! Seniors 1st, Sophomores 2nd!!!!! Corn-unity did abound, but I am still happy that we took 1 and 2. :)

"the hardest part was letting go, not taking part" This song is something that I think about 4 of my friends are going to get....and if you're not those 4, then it won't make sense to you. but I feel like I'm getting to the point where I need to let go...I've reached a certain level with this where I have let go, but I have still participated, if to a limited amount, in this, and i'm bowing out as of now.

" If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends, Make it last forever friendship never ends, If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give, Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is." My big sis is a member of the BathTub Ring '10, which is an even class tradition (singing group of 5 girls). The girls sang this tonight. It's always been a favorite song of mine...and I feel like it really stood out to a few of us. Our friendship will never end. Not if it's true friendship.

"I hear You say, "My love is over. It's underneath. It's inside. It's in between. The times you doubt Me, when you can't feel. The times that you question, 'Is this for real? ' The times you're broken.The times that you mend. The times that you hate Me, and the times that you bend. Well, My love is over, it's underneath. It's inside, it's in between. These times you're healing, and when your heart breaks.
The times that you feel like you're falling from grace. The times you're hurting.The times that you heal. The times you go hungry, and are tempted to steal.
The times of confusion, in chaos and pain. I'm there in your sorrow, under the weight of your shame. I'm there through your heartache. I'm there in the storm.
My love I will keep you, by My pow'r alone. I don't care where you fall, where you have been. I'll never forsake you, My love never ends. It never ends."" I know this one is long...but it still stands out to me. I've been broken completely lately. I've had so much stripped away. God has completely humbled me to the point of breaking....and yet He's been there with me every single step of the way. I've suffered heartache in the past year like none other....I've had family members who were close to me pass away, and it's caused me to question my faith like nothing else. Yet through it all God was there leading me and comforting me. And I know He'll continue to be...i just have to trust Him.

Just a couple random thoughts....and now that it's like 2:30 in the morning, I'm heading to bed. NIGHT!!! :)

I'd like to make myself believe that planet earth turns slowly...

What musical instrument do you play?
Piano.

who is the person you love the most?
Jesus!

what is love?
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (agreed!).

do you currently like anyone?
Well, I'd plead the fifth, but thanks to politics I can't in this case. SOOOOO I'm simply going to decline to answer and ask for transactional immunity should I be asked this question (thank you Dr. Frazier!)

What is the meaning of life?
42

Do you like thunderstorms?
I adore them.

Do you drink coffee?
Indeed!

Do you like to bake/cook?
I adore it! cooking and baking is a stress reliever.

What are your "comfy clothes"?
my favorite sweats, a favorite t-shirt of mine, and a hoodie.

What colour are your eyes?
Mostly blue, but they can look green or purplish depending on the light or what I'm wearing.

If you could time travel, what would be your first stop?
either to the civil war, or to the era of pride and prejudice.

What is your natural hair color?
blondish brownish.

Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt?
uh...neither.

Whats the First Thing You Notice In A Boy/Girl?
Eyes usually. But character quickly follows.

What language would you like to speak fluently?
Gaelic

Desktop or Laptop?
both. My laptop is convenient, but any files I want are stored on my desktop.

Whats your favorite sport?
Swimming, Skating, Softball, Basketball, and Football. Not necessarily in that order. :P

Are you in love?
I think love takes significant time, so no.

How many kids (or any at all) would you want to have?
At LEAST 6.

Sour or sweet candy?
chocolate. So neither. :P

Favorite hot drink?
a favorite tea of mine.

City or the suburbs?
neither. Give me a home in the country, thank you.

What religion did you choose to follow?
I'm a christian, but it's not a religion, it's a relationship with my Lord and Savior.

Performing Arts, Fine Arts, or Sports?
Any and all!!!!

What is your favorite color?
purple, pink, or teal.


beach or mountain?
both. I love both...but mountains mostly. beach is too flat.

who do you count on when feeling down
My friends and my family.

do you plan in advance
Sometimes, yes.

What attracts you most?
To the opposite sex? I'm going to go with a love for Jesus, stability, treats his family amazing, preferably a country boy but that's not a requirement, taller than me (but that's not hard...haha).

How many hobbies do you have
A few

Do you say "I love you" in the relationship?
I can't imagine why not....love is a beautiful thing.


Describe your perfect Sunday morning?
Waking up, going to church, coming home and curling up beside someone I love and taking a beautiful nap. :)

If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
Either Montana, Virginia, or Ireland.

If you have friends coming for supper what would you cook?
I'm not sure...which friends?

What is your favourite word?
Phantasmagoria. (has memories for several people in my highschool english class.)

What makes you cry?
a few things...songs, movies, and books mostly.

What makes you laugh?
I adore laughing.

If you won the lottery, how would you spend your millions?
I'd save some of it, invest in a ranch, and donate the rest.

What 3 words would your best friend use to describe you?
I'm not sure...she'll have to answer that one! :)

Where do you see yourself in five years?
Hopefully finished with school and teaching somewhere.

Do you own any pets, and if so what do you have?
I have a dog (doc)

Who do you admire most?
My mom and my grandparents.

Do you have any tattoos, and if so what and where?
None.

When do you plan on getting married?
Whenever God so wishes. Hopefully it'll be in the next few years, but it's His choice.

How do you feel?
relaxed.

What size shoes do you wear?
8 1/2

Water or 100% Juice?
MMM either


Would you rather lose an arm or a leg?
NEITHER!!

Favorite Place to Eat?
This little italian family-owned place in Urbanna, VA. Angelo's is the best places ever.

Opera, Musical, Concert, Play, Performance, or Other?
Any and all.


What are some of your favorite Disney Films?
Oh, gosh. Beauty and the Beast, Peter Pan, Cinderella, Mary Poppins, Hercules...I could go on.

What was your last thought?
Something about Pemberly estate....hahaha

Favorite fruit?
hmmm.....peaches or pears.

Describe yourself in 3 words?
Romantic. Stubborn. Dreamer.

Do you eat cold cereal at night?
Not usually.

What is your favorite TV show?
The Office or Scrubs

Kill the spider or let it out?
KILL IT!!!

Do you shower every single day?
Yes, I have to.

Where do you want to travel next?
Montana, back to Vermont, Ireland, England...I can go on. hahaha

What is your favorite place?
The farm.

If you could have one super human power what would you choose?
To be invisible.

Vitamin Water or Gatorade?
Vitamin Water

Flip flops or tennis shoes?
flipflops.

What is your favorite song of all time?
I could never choose that. Ever.

Random collection of thoughts

I'm not kidding you, this post is about the most random you will see. It's basically a list of things running through my head

1) I want to be in Montana.
2) Why do teachers always schedule due-dates on the same day?
3) Sundrop makes me happy
4) I love baking....not sure why. It's comforting.
5) I like driving when I'm in the car by myself....it's comforting
6) I unfortunately don't have time for this anymore
7) Pride and Prejudice should be a household staple
8) Disney music is the best music to write a paper to
9) There is way too much violence in movies...and having to watch them for school makes it worse
10) I miss being 8 and not having to do so much work
11) I enjoy school, except when I have this amount of homework,
12) God is amazing
13) Nothing else matters except what He wants for my life
14) Some things I will never understand, but I have to trust that God knows what's best
15) My life is NOT a Shakespearean tragedy.
16) I can't wait til I can have kids....I want a ton of them
17) I also just discovered Meredith has a harp department? Looks like I'll be taking that
18) The weather is gorgeous outside
19) I'm excited about cornhuskin' on friday
20) I have the best friends in the world.

My Literary Blog

So I started a separate blog for my book project. I'll be posting all the book reviews and such on that one, and still post over here as well. :) http://aliterarymind.blogspot.com/. :) That said, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ABIGAIL!!!! :)

True Femininity

I'm sitting in class right now, listening to my *favorite* English teacher talking about feminism. Again. For the....5th class in a row. Today she started talking about an article grabber in the News and Observer. I don't agree with News and Observer all the time, or as my old debate teacher calls it, the News and Disturber, but this time I found them rather catchy. They were talking about Hillary Clinton's trips, and mentioned that she was sporting the pantsuits. Dr. D. took a MAJOR offense to this phrase, and even wrote in an editorial. Well, in order to curb my slight anger and frustration, I began writing out a list. A list of what true femininity is. Now, I don't typically share things out of my notebook, but I figured I'd post this here for the benefit of others. I can't promise that it entirely makes sense or is accurate...but it expresses my feelings on femininity.

What is True Femininity?

1) Not being ashamed about being called a lady, girl, or otherwise.
2) Knowing that wearing skirts or dresses are a mark of femininity and not being ashamed to wear them.
3) Allowing men to be gentlemen, and not assuming they are doing it because we are weak.
4) Being soft-spoken
5) Knowing how to serve
6) Not being "one of the guys" all the time.
7) Having a pure vocabulary.
8) Realizing that the beauty of a woman is her spirit and heart.
9) Being Trustworthy
10) Having good manners.
11) Being strong, yet not self-assuming
12) Taking Care of Children
13) Teaching others
14) Knowing that a career comes AFTER her family...not the other way around.
15) Listening to others, not just talking
16) Cooking.
17) Treating guys with respect, not because they are better but because they are a God-given head.
18) Having a belief in God.
19) Being Classy.
20) Not flirting with guys
21) Knowing the balance between making her own decisions, yet still relying on the advice of her spouse, significant other, or father.
22) Being graceful, and not just the way a woman walks, but her spirit.
23) Keeping her innocence
24) Having a great sense of humor
25) Knowing how to do things that most feminist women can't, because it is deemed "below them."

Book Blogging project: suggestions?

So Jess, part of this post is your fault. :P After a discussion with jessica yesterday, I decided to go through my old journals and notebooks to see what I could discover. In the middle of one that I had back during my sophomore year in highschool, which was 4 years ago, I found a list. I think I had been inspired by Walk to Remember, and it was a list of life goals. About halfway down, there was one that made me think. It said "read 1000 books in a year." Well, I decided that for this "blogging project" of mine, I would read 365 books in a year, since that seems a TAD bit more realistic than 1000. Thus this post: Do any of you have any suggestions? I already know I want to read through all of C.S. Lewis's works and C.J. Mahaney's books. I'd like for these books to fall under books that I should read, not just books that are completely enjoyable reads. I want some of those, but I'd like the majority to be things that will be beneficial, if you catch my drift. I plan on beginning this project on October 8th, which is the day we begin our fall break. Granted, I am aware that I won't have a completely formulated list of books by then, but I'd like to at least have my first 50 books or so listed out. I'll probably start a separate blog for this project, but for now i'm posting this on my main one. And for my Facebook friends who are curious, my blog is http://princessforhim90.blogspot.com. :)

Virtual Worlds: Good or Bad?

Today's English 200 class was probably the most...interesting English class I've been in. It started off normal enough, well, normal for OUR English class. You see, it was "bring in your barbie" day. Apparently Barbie dolls were the start of feminism and are the picture of true feminists because you can dress your barbie's up as career women.

But that's not what this is about. Somehow this class took a downhill spiral when we started talking about conventions. This turned into an intense conversation about the online virtual world. Apparently, there is this website called Second Life. And it allows you to, well, live a second life virtually. There was a guy on campus this morning that talked to the teaching fellows. He is very, very much into this second life thing. He talked about how great it was for teachers, since they could basically life both lives. And, if that weren't enough, we found out our entire history and English faculty have second life accounts, and use them.

This started an intense discussion about the ethics of virtual lives. There is one girl (who shall remain nameless) who has apparently had a virtual life since she was 13. We all found that disturbing to put it mildly. it shows as well, because she lacks an ability to socialize in a normal situation. The question on how safe this was was raised as well. As an actress, I've seen how hard it can be to break out of the separate character traits you have to pick up. The other girl argued that it was perfectly fine to have a separate life, because you can separate the virtual from the real world.

I, however, have a huge issue with how virtual all our lives are becoming. Every person has a facebook, twitter, email, myspace, and other online forums they use. I bet every one of us spends about 5 hours of our day online. I feel like our entire culture is becoming revolved around computers and virtual lives. We can create our own identity online.

When I was a kid, I can remember spending HOURS outside per day. Now, I rarely see any kids in my neighborhood outside playing and having fun. The life we used to live was that of simplicity and fun...now the life we all live revolves around technology and virtuality. There's even studies out about how teenagers are having a hard time communicating when they don't talk through an artificial form....face to face conversation is becoming a lost art. And I am in this group, because I do spend wayy too much time online. And yet, to be a part of this culture, it's required.

Praise?

I was looking through some quotes of C.S. Lewis, and I stumbled on this one from his reflections on the Psalms "I think we delight to praise what we enjoy because the praise not merely expresses but completes the enjoyment; it is its appointed consummation." One thing I've noticed lately has been how many people "praise God" yet do with no enjoyment. They do it like it's rote memorization. That's the thing I dislike so much about modern churches....it's very difficult to find a church that doesn't use the rote method.

The thing that I love about Psalms is that David truly is a man after God's heart. He clearly enjoys God with everything. Even when he's upset, or angry about a decision, he still respects God and loves Him. So many people disregard the Psalms because it can be "full of fluff," yet I would argue that it's one of the best books in the Bible. If you truly read it, it's fascinating to see this one man's love for his Savior and his enjoyment in being given so many days and opportunities to worship Him. I can only pray that I am given the same opportunities to praise my Savior.

Dancing Through Life

I think last night tops the chart to date of my favorite nights. At least when it comes to dancing and friends. You see, I finally made it out to a contra dance at NC State. The LAST time I was supposed to go out there I had just injured my knee, so I was unable to attend. However, since I have been injury free for about 4 months now, I figured I'd be fine. :) And I have to say...if I had known it would be this much fun, I would have danced through the pain last time.

Mr. B was so kind to drive for us, since he attended State and knew his way around much better than Lizzie, Jess, or I did. They picked me up at Meredith, and we were off to State. We were all a tad nervous when we got there, but thankfully all three of us ended up with experienced partners the first set, so we were able to follow along pretty easily. And our square dancin' skills really helped a lot. I even shocked one of my old friends by telling her it was my first contra dance.

Since I didn't bring a camera, I'll have to wait for lizzie or Abigail to post pics, since I believe they both took some. But needless to say, it was so much fun. I can't wait until the next one! I actually have the dates marked on my calendar. :P Of course, now I am super exhausted, have a slight cold, and blisters, but it was worth every ounce of that. :P As Abigail commented this morning "I could have danced all night... I could have danced all night..." :)

I just haven't met you yet....

Ok. If anyone knows me, you know that I am a DIE HARD Michael Buble fan. His music makes me sooo happy. Anyways, he has an a new album coming out in early october, and he released a single off that album. This song has topped my Buble chart of favorites, so I thought I'd share it with you! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcx9cZEqP1U

Give me a sunday mornin' that's full of grace....

Sometimes I feel like my life is a little like Anne of Green Gables. I have the most amazing friends. Granted, there are quite a few more of them than Diana. But they are all what I would consider "bosom buddies" and "kindred spirits". And I am going to a girls school that might as well be considered finishing school. except you don't learn the same manners. :P I have an amazing community of friends and family. And lastly, I want to be a teacher. The only two things missing are Gil (who is adorable!!!!!! (yes I'm watching it now)), and Anne's red hair (though I did have orange hair for about a month...hmmm....). :)

That said, I have a study abroad appointment tomorrow at 1 about Oxford. As scary as it is for me to leave my family and friends for a semester and go that far away, I feel like I'm not going to get a chance like this ever again. Plus, it's oxford!!!

I have fallen back in love with my piano again. I forgot how wonderful it is to sit down and play. I did that the other night instead of homework, and I think it's the most relaxed I've been all year. Definitely something that I plan on doing again. In fact, I'm getting more scores monday! I have seriously missed sitting down and working on a piece, learning it perfectly.

a brief recap/summer plans.

Well, let's see if I can recap the last week or two.

School started a month ago, hard to believe it's been that long. My classes aren't too hard, yet they aren't easy, either. So far all my grades are A's or B's, but midterms are coming up....we'll see how that works out. :P I am now on the Meredith SGA (student government association) Senate. That takes quite a bit of time, but I'm loving it. I decided not to swim aqua angels, because my schedule is busy, but I am swimming practices with the team tuesday and thursday nights.

I'm looking into three options for the spring. Staying here at Meredith is the first. The second is a program I need to look into. Basically I can spend either a semester or a year in Colonial Williamsburg, attending William and Mary and working in the city. If you know me, you know that W&M was my top choice of colleges coming out of hs. The 3rd option is a semester long study abroad program in either Italy, Ireland, or Oxford. I'm not sure which program I'm going to be doing yet.

I've also been rethinking my career. I'm starting to get burned out a tad with what I'm doing. I love my major, don't get me wrong. But I am not sure that I want to spend the next 4 years doing this, and the rest of my life this way. I'm thinking about that, though.

I am super excited for the next few months. I'm going to see West Side Story, 10th Avenue North, TSO, and Phantom this year. That is going to be incredible. Phantom is one of my favorite shows ever, and I'm seeing it at the DPAC with some of my best friends. :)

Finally, I am really wanting to do something crazy in the summer. AnnaBeth and I talked about a road trip/race to california. Is anyone game for this? We could make it closer, but I am really at that point in my life where I want to get out and see what else there is...blame it on my gypsy blood. It's a wanderlust. BUT i think it would be amazing. :)

Where were you?

So where were you eight years ago?

I can still remember that day like it was yesterday. I was 11. Mom was sitting in the living room folding laundry on the couch. I was sitting on the floor reading. The phone rang, and it was my aunt. I can remember her asking mom if she had the tv on. When mom told her no, she said to cut it on.

I didn’t completely understand what was going on at first. I knew that planes had just hit the WTC, but didn’t know what that meant for Americans. I watched in horror as not one, but 2 planes hit. Finally, I couldn't handle the images anymore. I ran to my room, and turned on the radio. I ran back into the living room when I heard the 1st tower fall.

And then the Pentagon...that one scared me. at the time, my uncle was working in that exact section of the pentagon. Because of the nature of his job, we didn't know whether he was there or not. So we spent hours sitting by the phone, praying that either he or my grandparents would call and let us know he was ok. We finally got a call late that afternoon, letting us know he was on a plane to London when it happened.

That night, our church held a candlelight vigil. I can remember standing in church, surrounded by both friends, regular church attendees, and people I’m sure had never seen the inside of a church. Black, white, poor, rich, farmer, banker...it didn't matter. We were all united.


Where were you?

Have You Forgotten?

The Purpose of Prayer

My utmost for His Highest Oswald Chambers August 28th


". . . one of His disciples said to Him, ’Lord, teach us to pray . . .’ —Luke 11:1

Prayer is not a normal part of the life of the natural man. We hear it said that a person’s life will suffer if he doesn’t pray, but I question that. What will suffer is the life of the Son of God in him, which is nourished not by food, but by prayer. When a person is born again from above, the life of the Son of God is born in him, and he can either starve or nourish that life. Prayer is the way that the life of God in us is nourished. Our common ideas regarding prayer are not found in the New Testament. We look upon prayer simply as a means of getting things for ourselves, but the biblical purpose of prayer is that we may get to know God Himself.

"Ask, and you will receive . . ." ( John 16:24 ). We complain before God, and sometimes we are apologetic or indifferent to Him, but we actually ask Him for very few things. Yet a child exhibits a magnificent boldness to ask! Our Lord said, ". . . unless you . . . become as little children . . ." ( Matthew 18:3 ). Ask and God will do. Give Jesus Christ the opportunity and the room to work. The problem is that no one will ever do this until he is at his wits’ end. When a person is at his wits’ end, it no longer seems to be a cowardly thing to pray; in fact, it is the only way he can get in touch with the truth and the reality of God Himself. Be yourself before God and present Him with your problems— the very things that have brought you to your wits’ end. But as long as you think you are self-sufficient, you do not need to ask God for anything.

To say that "prayer changes things" is not as close to the truth as saying, "Prayer changes me and then I change things." God has established things so that prayer, on the basis of redemption, changes the way a person looks at things. Prayer is not a matter of changing things externally, but one of working miracles in a person’s inner nature."

To give?

It's taken me until now to understand a principle that an old tcc friend of mine mentioned years ago. It comes down to the principle of giving selflessly. There's a homeless lady who begs on the exit I take every single day going to school. I've passed her countless times, without ever thinking another thought. Yet the last few days, I've been thinking, "What if I were in her shoes?" I felt God was saying that even a gesture can mean more to her than anything, and I needed to trust Him. When I went to hand her something this morning, she looked at me and replied "Thank you, baby, God bless you." Why is it that I've never seen an atheist beggar? They all say God bless you.

I know the average person would say that they're just using it for drugs/booze whatever. But by trusting the person to use the money worthwhile, I feel like you're giving them more than just money. You're giving them your trust, which is worth far more than any gift you could give them. They might spend the money using other things, but that's their responsibility. I am called, as a Christian, to selflessly serve those around me.

Now that doesn't just include giving 5 bucks to the person on the street or whatever. I feel like it also includes volunteer to soup kitchens and the like. Look at the beauty of Mother Teresa. She's so renowned because she spent her entire life giving selflessly, not caring about what she was facing, or whether the people she was serving were deserving of her time and energy. She just gave, which is what I feel like God calls us to do as Christians.

I dreamed myself thousand times around the world...

I got on here to write something unrelated to this, but I feel like I need this entry, so I'm posting it, even though it started out as a weird rant. I've got a wide variety of friends, all with different characteristics. But the one thing that they all have in common that I don't with them is this: They aren't going to college, and I am. Now, I'm not going to argue that college is the only way to go. Nor am I going to argue that they are wrong, because I don't believe they are. I do, however, find myself wondering sometimes, whether or not I actually fit in. The life I've chosen is different. Sure, I'm getting a licensure to teach, which isn't like I'm leaving the area or anything extremely drastic. But I sometimes feel like I am one in a million when it comes to my friends. They talk about sleepovers, parties, swim team, and having fun, and I'm stuck inside, reviewing movies for Dr. English, doing stats homework for Dr. Johnson, reading chapters of info for Dr. Martinson, or typing up a case brief for Dr. Frazier. Now, I enjoy every single one of these things, though admittedly, not all at once. I have a love for learning, and I love every class I have ever had (even the ones I complain about at the time). But I hate how, once the school year starts, I feel like I am no longer a part of my circle of friends, because I don't have the time to goof off like I do during the summer. I know I'll continue to see them, whenever possible, but it's not the same during the school year, because I have a totally different set of responsibilities to handle. And I know it's probably me overreacting, but I can't help but wonder sometimes what my life would have been like had I not chosen to further my education....

Now onto homework loads this month...yeah, I think this semester is going to murder me. I'm taking 18 hours, which seemed easy, until I started the classes. THey're all writing intensive classes, so I'm going to be writing at least 4 essays a week. At least. and 8 or so case briefs per week...fun stuff. I do, however, love my classes and my professors, so maybe that will make the load a little more fun and easier to accomplish.

And finally, Anna and I have this ingenious idea of a road race across country. More on that later. :P

I want a love that will last

The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books here. How do your reading habits stack up?

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meany - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Inferno – Dante
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

As you can tell, I have FAR outread this book list. :P And finally, I'm leaving you with a link to my latest musical obsession. I couldn't find a youtube link, so here's a playlist link. The third one on there is the one I'm listening to. It's the 3:32 one in length. http://www.playlist.com/searchbeta/tracks#a%20love%20that%20will%20last

Schedule

Since school's about to start, I figured I'd post my schedule over here so if any of you need to get up with me, you'll know when I'm in class or not. ;)

Monday and Wednesday:
Politics 301 @ 11 with Dr. Frazier
Math 245 @ 2 with Dr. Johnson
History 103 @ 3:30 with Dr. Martinson

Tuesday and Thursday:
English 358 @ 9:30 with R. Duncan
English 200 @ 12:30 with R. Duncan
English 240 @ 2 with S. English

Friday:
Politics 301 @ 11 with Dr. Frazier

Quiz copied from Meredith and Lizzie

1. What two qualities do you want most in your future husband (besides being a Christian)? The same sacrificial love for his family that I saw in my granddad and humility

2. Is there a fictional character you see as a model for your future husband? Mr. Knightly or Gilbert Blythe.

3. Where do you want your wedding? My first choice is our family farm just across the NC/Va border. If I can't have that...Lizzie, could I use your front yard? :P

4. What are your views on courtship? It's complicated to explain. I'm very much against modern forms of dating, but I can also see flaws with certain forms of courtship as well. I'm for it, provided it doesn't become a legalistic, this is the only way to go, mindset.

5. Do you have a purity ring/locket? I have a purity ring that my daddy gave me on my 13th birthday, that I've worn on my left hand ever since. And it will remain there until I'm engaged.

6. Do you have or want a hope chest? I don't have one, yet I have enough stuff to fill a hope chest. I'll probably inherent my great-grandmothers.

7. Will you wear a veil at your wedding? I'm honestly not sure. More than likely, yes. But I don't know yet.

8. What kind of wedding dress do you want? I want a simple one. Nothing too big or flowing. Not a strapless, but one with cap sleeves or sleeveless. or those lace sleeves I've seen on David's Bridal. It has to be white, and floor-length, but I don't want a train, and I don't want a really expensive one.

9. What color bridesmaid dresses do you want? Either a violet colored one, or a black one. I'd like to keep the wedding party simple, and thinking that through is rather complicated 'cause I have to have my 2 cousins in the wedding, and I would love to have my best friends, but that's pretty much impossible to have everyone. And I don't care what kind of style the dresses are. I want them to be re-usable.

10. What flowers do you want in your bouquet? Lizzie's right, it depends on the season. I'd LOVE to have roses, though. I have a huge fascination and love of roses.

11. What do you want to name one of your daughters? Like Lizzie, I LOVE celtic names. Limiting me to one is impossible. Alana, Moyna, Bevin, and Mairead.

12. What do you want to name one of your sons? I can't limit this to one. Tiernan, Aidan, or Sean are my top choices for that.

13. How many kids do you want? As many as God sees fit to bless me with. I'd be happy with anywhere from 1-15. I'd love to have at least 6, but it's God's decision.

14. What music do you want to play at your wedding? Strings and piano, if possible. That one might be a little difficult, though....

15. Are you a hopeless romantic? I am, and I'm not. I am in that I love romance, I am a sucker for it. Yet I really just want a simple love, with a family surrounded by my best friends.

Offline

So I'm going to be offline for the next couple days as much as possible. My great-uncle passed away this morning, and I'm going to be traveling this weekend/beginning part of the week to our family farm and graveyard for the immediate family burial, and then to Richmond for the public burial. I have internet on my mom's phone, so you can still leave me messages, and I can still get them, I just might not always reply right away.

A random survey since I don't have time for a real entry. :)

What were you doing 30 minutes ago? Driving. :)

Last restaurant you went to? uh....I'm not sure....i'm going to CFA in a few minutes, though.

Did you have an exciting last weekend? Um...I don't even remember what I did....I know I didn't go to church.....

Have you ever crawled through a window? Lol. Yes!! :P

Where were you at 1AM sunday morning? Probably talking to Jess or Jolie.

Last person you texted? Naam I think....


Do you like yourself? yeah

Have you ever dyed your hair? Yes, and we all know how well that didn't work.

Are you wearing a necklace? yes. I never take it off unless I'm swimming or having an MRI or something.

Is there anything in your past that you'd like to try again? sure

How's your heart lately? It's beating. :P

What is your relationship status? single

Look behind you, what do you see? my wall

How many rooms does your house have? I have no clue... a lot?

Have you ever worked in a food place? Not technically....

Who and where was the last concert you went to? Josh Gracin, Meherrin River Arts council.

Any summer plans for 2009? Summer's almost over. But hopefully a beach trip before it ends

What did you eat for lunch today? Bacon and Lettuce Sandwich.

Whats on your schedule for tomorrow? work allllll day. Calls or texts are ok. :P

The last song you heard? Summertime by Rascal Flatts (I was driving)

How do you feel about abortions?....... well how do you feel about murder? exactly

How often do you drive? Quite a lot, actually.

Do you know anyone that is currently locked up? Yep. A murderer, in fact. He and his wife (the one he murdered or supposedly did) went to my parents church in Lumberton.

Do you think you are humble? Well, if I said yes, then I wouldn't be humble, and if I said no, then I still wouldn't be humble...this is a loaded question. ;)

Last time you ate a homegrown tomato? I don't like tomatoes.

ever ordered from an infomercial? nope

Have you ever requested a song on the radio? yes

Do you hate the last girl you were talking to? nope

When is the last time you took a nap? Thursday for 15 minutes. Before that...it's been a while.

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? My mom I think.

To text you? Haven't you already asked this?

What are you listening to? Complete silence.

Something interesting happen lately? yep

What were you doing at 8:00 this morning? Sleeping.

Do you chew on your straws? when i'm nervous

Who was the last person you rode in the car with that was under 21? Um....you mean who was driving that was under 21? Probably Matt when we went to Sound of Music.

Do you have curly hair? Negative. far from it.

Is there anyone who doesn't like you because of something you didn't do? probably

Where did you go today? Sophie's to get work info and then to starbucks. :) And now I'm going to CFA, and to Jess's improv show.

Are you a heavy sleeper? sometimes

When was the last time you hand washed the dishes? today.

Who were the last people you ate with? family

Do you have college plans? I'm in college. MC baby

Are you mad at anyone right now? nope

What is your favorite flavor of jelly? grape

Tell me about the last dream you remember having? hahahaha. It involved kayaking, my family, grave robbing, a few friends, some people I don't like, dancing, a wedding, a horse, and the river/ocean. Yeah. :P

Did you meet anybody new today? nope

Do you say aim or a-i-m? a-i-m ha I know I'm just that weird

When was the last time you talked on aim? uh.....a few weeks ago.

Would you dance to the taco song? huh?

Have you ever counted to 1,000? yeah

Have you ever been in a castle? yeah I think so

Do you have a cell-phone? yeah

Can you use chop sticks? no

Ever have cream puffs? cream puffs? what?

Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect? seen the movie? No. I've heard of the theory, though. Yeah, I know I'm a geek. ;)

Ever walked into a wall? hahahaha yeah...

Are you sarcastic? Maybe....

Where was your profile picture taken at? I don't have one on here. My fb one was at the seahawks banquet.

Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people? Somewhere around that number, but I don't hate anyone. I don't have that right.

What is your favorite animal? Dolphin. Hands down.

Can you hula hoop? Only one hoop, but yes.

Puttin' on the Ritz

So I've realized that my music is a tad...abnormal. Haha. I was walking in whole foods today picking up some ingredients for dinner tonight (homemade spaghetti sauce), and I had my iPod playing. I had three people ask me what I was listening to, and my answers were as follows: "The Rocky Road to Dublin" by the Dubliners, "Masquerade" from Phantom of the Opera, and "Ya Never Know" from Little Shop of Horrors. I got similar responses with each of them: A raised eyebrow, or a "my, you have unusual music tastes." Which I suppose is true. I do have extremely unusual music tastes. But mine are more unusual by modern standards. I don't mind listening to G105, in fact it's fun to drive to. But it's not real music. It takes no talent to sing a song like "That's Not My Name." It takes no talent to write that song, either. I think I've decided I was either born in the wrong era for music, or in the wrong country. And since music is a huge part of my life, that's not so great. Because eventually, the stations that play music I like are going to start playing music of this generation. *sigh* Dad says I just need a customized station in the car. I am forever changing the channel, because I am very particular about what I like or don't like. I wish there was a way to actually get a soundtrack channel or a celtic station without having satellite radio.

Summer nights!

I figured since I was already avoiding my chores for the week, I might as well do something semi-productive and write a blog entry about my summer, since I just now realized it's almost over *sobs*. This has probably been my favorite summer thus far in my short lifespan. I chose not to work this summer, and while that means I'm going to have to do a work/study program at Meredith in the fall, it was entirely worth it. I spent most of my summer hanging out with friends, and traveling to Richmond to visit my grandma.

I was blessed to be able to work into my schedule all but one of our swim meets this summer. Seahawks were blessed to be given their second undefeated season in a row!!! :) The last meet was definitely one no one will be forgetting for a while. Season's technically over, but there's still a two week pre-season class thingie, and I'm fairly certain I'm doing that. (yes, kara and jess, I am going to be swimming *shock*. ;) )

I also got to go to see Sound of Music with my friends a week ago. That was probably the best night of my life. God totally allowed us to be given 6 free tickets when we got to Memorial Auditorium. The show wasn't my favorite, but the sets were incredible!! And there's nothing like driving around downtown afterwards, eating at IHOP, and getting home well past midnight. :)

I've started to realize that I drastically needed to get my priorities in line. My junior year, I took a civics class from TCC. The first book we read was called, "The Pursuit of Happiness" by J.P. Moreland and Klaus Issler. I've read that book at least 5 times since then, but I never let one of the lessons in that book hit me until this summer. The one about Godly friendships. I've always had Godly friends, but rarely have I personally taken the time to cultivate my friendships. I assumed they would always be there. And then this past year, I learned that sometimes the people you thought would be your friends weren't really friends, and the ones you might have overlooked would end up being friends for life. This summer, I've deepened some friendships I had before, and became friends with some people I wasn't friends with before. I have the best friends in the world, and I am so blessed to have all of them in my life. :) Y'all should know who you are.

All that to say, I can't wait to see what the next year has in store for every single one of us. And with that said, I'm going to go get back to work on my chores. :P Later, y'all!! :)

Top 25 movie quotes

I'm a huge quote person. And so here's a few of my top list of movie quotes, in no particular order.

1: "Here's looking at you, kid." ~Casablanca
2: "Noah:My Dearest Allie. I couldn’t sleep last night because I know that it’s over between us. I’m not bitter any more, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I’ll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that’s what you’ve given me. That’s what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I’ll be seeing you. Noah. ~the notebook
3: "I am no one special. Just a common man with common thoughts. I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but in one respect I've succeeded as gloriously as anyone who ever lived. I've loved another with all my heart and soul and for me that has always been enough." ~ The Notebook
4: "Noah: Well that's what we do, we fight... You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.
Allie: So what?
Noah: So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day. Will you do something for me, please? Just picture your life for me? 30 years from now, 40 years from now? What's it look like? If it's with him, go. Go! I lost you once, I think I can do it again. If I thought that's what you really wanted. But don't you take the easy way out." ~Notebook
5: "You had me at 'hello'." ~Jerry McGuire
6: "One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don't know." Animal Crackers
7: "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." ~Casablanca
8: "My mother always said, life was like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get" ~Forest Gump
9: "The first rule of Fight Club is - you do not talk about Fight Club. The second rule of Fight Club is - you DO NOT talk about Fight Club." ~Fight Club
10: "Yo, Adrian" ~Rocky
11: ot that far from me, for trouble is near; haste Thee to help me. Blessed be the Lord my strength, which teacheth my hands to war, and my fingers to fight. My goodness, and my fortress; my high tower, and my deliverer; my shield, and he in whom I trust; who subdueth my people under me. O my God, I trust in thee: let me not be ashamed, let not mine enemies triumph over me" ~Saving Private Ryan
12: "It doesn't matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they are perfect for each other." ~Good Will Hunting
13: " I love that you get cold when it is 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." ~When Harry Met Sally
14: "Our love is like the wind... I can’t see it, but I sure can feel it." ~A Walk to Remember
15: "This house is so full of people it makes me sick. When I grow up and get married, I'm living alone." ~Home Alone
16: George Downes: The misery, the exquisite tragedy. The Susan Hayward of it all. I can just picture you there, sitting alone at your table in your lavender gown.
Julianne Potter: Did I tell you my gown was lavender?
George Downes: Hair swept up. Haven't touched your cake. Probably drumming your fingernails on the white linen tablecloth, the way you do when you're really feeling down. Perhaps looking at those nails thinking: 'God, I should have stopped in all my evil plotting to have that manicure, but it's too late now.
Julianne Potter: George, I didn't tell you my dress was lavender.
George Downes: Suddenly, a familiar song. And, you're off your chair in one, exquisite movement... wondering, searching, sniffing the wind like a dapple deer. Has God heard your little prayer? Will Cinderella dance again? And then, suddenly, the crowds part and there he is: sleek, stylish... radiant with charisma. Bizarrely, he's on the telephone. But then, so are you. And then he comes towards you... the moves of a jungle cat. Although you quite correctly sense that he is... gay... like most devastatingly handsome single men of his age are, you think... what the hell. Life goes on. Maybe there won't be marriage... maybe there won't be sex... but, by God, there'll be dancing. " ~My Best Friends Wedding
17: “Shaw was right. As we strain to grasp the things we desire, the things we think will make our lives better, – money, popularity, fame – we ignore what truly matters. The simple things. Like friendship, family, love. The things we probably already had.” One Tree Hill
18: "Mr. Darcy: Miss Elizabeth. I have struggled in vain and I can bear it no longer. These past months have been a torment. I came to Rosings with the single object of seeing you... I had to see you. I have fought against my better judgment, my family's expectations, the inferiority of your birth by rank and circumstance. All these things I am willing to put aside and ask you to end my agony.
Elizabeth Bennet: I don't understand.
Mr. Darcy: I love you. " ~Pride and Prejudice
19: "Mr. Darcy: You must know... surely, you must know it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I'd scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on." ~Pride and Prejudice
20: Scarlett: As God is my witness, as God is my witness they're not going to lick me. I'm going to live through this and when it's all over, I'll never be hungry again. No, nor any of my folk. If I have to lie, steal, cheat or kill. As God is my witness, I'll never be hungry again. " ~Gone with the Wind
21: "Do you mean to tell me, Katie Scarlett O'Hara, that Tara, that land doesn't mean anything to you? Why, land is the only thing in the world worth workin' for, worth fightin' for, worth dyin' for, because it's the only thing that lasts. " ~Gone With the Wind
22: There was a land of Cavaliers and Cotton Fields called the Old South... Here in this pretty world Gallantry took its last bow... Here was the last ever to be seen of Knights and their Ladies Fair, of Master and of Slave... Look for it only in books, for it is no more than a dream remembered. A Civilization gone with the wind... " ~Gone with the Wind
23: "This is a different kind of army. If you look at history you'll see men fight for pay, or women, or some other kind of loot. They fight for land, or because a king makes them, or just because they like killing. But we're here for something new. This hasn't happened much in the history of the world. We are an army out to set other men free. America should be free ground, from here to the Pacific Ocean. No man has to bow, no man born to royalty. Here we judge you by what you do, not by who your father was. Here you can be something. Here you can build a home. But it's not the land. There's always more land. It's the idea that we all have value, you and me. What we're fighting for, in the end, is each other. Sorry. Didn't mean to preach. " Gettysburg
24: "In the Army of the Shenandoah, you were the First Brigade! In the Army of the Potomac you were the First Brigade! In the Second Corps of this Army, you are the First Brigade! You are the First Brigade in the affections of your general, and I hope by your future deeds and bearing you will be handed down the posterity as the First Brigade in this our Second War of Independence. God Speed! " Gods and Generals
25: " This is for kids shinin' shoes in the streets with no shoes on their feet everyday. This is for guys sweatin' blood in the shop while the bosses and cops look away. This is to even the score. This ain't just Newsies no more. This ain't just kids with some pies in the sky, this is do it or die, this is WAR! Once and for all, we'll be there to defend one another. Once and for all, every kid is a friend, every friend a brother. Five thousand fists in the sky, five thousands reasons to try. We're going over the wall. Better to die than to crawl. Either we stand or we fall, for once, once and for all!" ~Newsies

Tales of the Kingdom memories

~The Green Dragons and their attempt to eat the Knights of the Pink Table.
~The Barely Blue Banners winning
~The duck walk
~Suicides
~A.C, Me, Taylor, and Justus doing the death crawl
~Army crawls (why is this starting to sound like military camp??)
~Shaky beds
~Josh falling asleep on stage during the show
~Taylor discovering he had 4 costume changes in the same scene
~Love Game and Josh's variations of it
~A.C.'s birthday
~Firemen trying the locked door while Alex had a boxcutter and I had an axe
~Setting up headquarters in the kitchen
~"Angus Barn, Goodberry's, Coup!"
~Josh's ever present headset comments. Let's just leave it at that.
~Tim's long breaks
~Sam's music
~Sweet tea
~Rocking out while working on set
~Learning how to Greek Dance
~Everyone's methods of de-stressing
~"Alex and Allie are making out!" "Can you guys stop laughing backstage?" (not really, had to put this one on here for Josh's benefit)
~"WTF are you doing?????" Alex's moment of losing it.
~Tim's That's What She Said jokes
~Josh's mouse
~Jake's slightly off color jokes
~The sacred flames
~Michael's costume being lost
~Not being able to find A.C. ;)
~How fast can we eat?
~Naptime
~Almost falling asleep while striking sets
~Our few moments of facebook time
~Wondering who had seen the scene we were running
~Josh getting hurt (even though that's a sad memory)
~The boys "breaking" flowers for the fans
~Kaitlin and I spinning around
~Josh's awesome light tossing
~Mollie, Josh, Alex, and I and the pail. ;)
~Goodberry's certificates

Sunday Southern Thoughts

"You get a line, I'll get a pole We'll go fishing in the crawfish hole Five-card poker on a Saturday night Church on Sunday morning"

I am so blessed to have grown up here in the South. Particularly to have grown up in a Southern family in the heart of the Bible belt. Nothing will ever beat a relaxing saturday night with a group of friends, then a Sunday church service. The summers in the South, as hot as they may be sometime, are the best ever. It's perfect for going down to a creak and swimming in (making sure to avoid all snakes of course). We have the culture, the manners, and the relaxation. Yes, there is nothing better than being a Southerner. :)

Narcissism?

I've been going back over my own blog, and some of my friends old blog entries. Particularly some of my old TCC friends. I came across one entry about life, and in there this person talked about how cool it would be to completely put your faith in God. Sell all your possessions, and head off to the middle of nowhere to preach the good news. And that's when it hit me. Americans are so narcissistic. I knew this, but I hadn't thought about it in this way. No one in our country would actually sell their possessions and live off nothing. Money becomes way too important in our lives. Things become too important. We expect to have a 2 story house, a new car for each person in our family, a chance to do whatever we want. But in reality, that stuff doesn't really matter. What matters is God and doing His work. Taking the time to eat dinner with our family instead of rushing off to do something else. Rather than going shopping, just going out to a lake and walking around with your best friend talking about life.

Also, how much we spend on things we don't need. I can count on just one of my dresses at least 15 things that I don't need. Why do we spend money on these things? Why not spend money on things we actually need? Or why not donate more to the poor?

On top of all that, why is no one willing to take risks? We prefer to play it safe. Always stay within our boxes, never willing to step out of those and embrace our full potential. Oftentimes, that potential is just outside our reach, and all it takes is a simple step beyond our comfort zone to grasp it. God's given all of us talents, so why are so many people passive now? Chivalry, in many ways, is a lost art. Most guys (for those of you who don't fit this category, I commend you) are perfectly fine with us girls taking the drivers seat. I have a huge problem with this, because I don't feel like that's fitting into God's plan. I guess I'm just really frustrated with this culture. I want the culture prior to the 1900's. One where boys were young men of valor, where girls were young ladies of virtue. Where dancing wasn't considered feminine by the standards of society, and where girls didn't have to make the first move in things.

I Still Believe

I can remember listening to this song in music video form one Christmas with my younger cousins. Every Christmas, we always get movies and/or music. This year was no different. I can't remember what I received, but my younger cousin Mary Katherine got Cinderella 3. Even though there are 2 tv's in the house, they are both in constant use between the adults watching games on one, or the boys playing video games on the other. So when us girls want to watch a movie, we'll go out to the RV and stick it in, cook some popcorn, and just chill on the 2 couches in there (it's pretty much a house on wheels). I fell in love with this song, and have periodically listened to it since then. :) Enjoy!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ItoI8mINIO0

Some how I know I will find a way
To a brighter day in the sun
Somewhere I know that he waits for me
Someday soon he'll see I'm the one

I won't give up on this feeling
And nothing will keep me away

'Cause I still believe in destiny
That you and I were meant to be
I still wish on the stars as they fall from above
'Cause I still believe
Believe in love

I know what's real cannot be denied
Although it may hide for a while
With just one touch love can conquer fears
Turning all your tears into smiles

It's such a wondrous feeling
I know that my heart can't be wrong

'Cause I still believe in destiny
That you and I were meant to be
I still wish on the stars as they fall from above
'Cause I still believe
Believe in love

Love can make miracles
Change everything
Lift you from the darkness and make your heart sing
Love is forever
When you fall
It's the greatest time of them all

'Cause I still believe in destiny
That you and I were meant to be
I still wish on the stars as they fall from above
'Cause I still believe
Believe in love

Yes I still believe
Believe in love
Still believe in love
I still believe
Believe in love

Time Waster?

I realized today how much time I personally spend online. So I'm going to be taking a slight hiatus from things. Not from Blogger perse, but mainly from facebook and IM. You can always call or text me, and my email works as well. But I need to be getting some priorities straight, and those aren't being accomplished while waisting my life away, as my uncle puts it, on the internet. :)

“Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.”

“Do you remember the things you were worrying about a year ago? How did they work out? Didn't you waste a lot of fruitless energy on account of most of them? Didn't most of them turn out all right after all?”

Dale Carnegie hit the nail on the head with that quote. Since Jess posted her year summary, I've been thinking about my last year. And how much has happened. How much I worried, only to have things turn out right. And what I've learned.

I graduated last may being so confident about college. I was going to go into Meredith, graduate in 4 years with a political science major, go to law school, work for 3 years, then join the FBI. I was stupid, and refused to listen to the one man who knows me and the school system combined better than anyone. My granddad. Dan had been in school....well, most of his life while he jointly raised a family, worked a job, and got his graduate and doctorate degrees. And then after he got his doctorate, he worked jobs that varied from teaching, being a head school superintendent for VA, and working for UVA among many things. Dan knows every aspect of the school system better than anyone I know. And he told me that I had no business living on campus my freshman year. I can remember sitting in the family room, in the exact seat I'm sitting in now, talking to him about college and what the next year would hold. And I remember him telling me that there were pressures in college I wouldn't even know how to handle. And if I lived 24/7 in an environment like that, I would succumb. Not only that, but my grades would not be top-notch. Unfortunately, like a stupid teenager not willing to admit I didn't know it all, I decided to live on campus.

That summer, I was busy in preparation for college. That july, though, something happened that, even though I didn't know it at the time, would send me on a downward spiral with my faith and my life. My granddad, Dan, was diagnosed with cancer. I knew he hadn't been well for the past year, but we all thought it was something else. But cancer....even that word evokes fear in me. And the pain I felt then and still feel now isn't even describable. That same month, I went up there and spent a week with them. I can remember looking at Barbara and Dan, knowing that I wanted that kind of a marriage. For Better or for Worse. In Sickness and in Health. They were always there for each other. Throughout the next few months, their love for each other was so evident. As the next few months passed, I would find myself questioning everything. I remember remarking to a girl at school that everytime we'd go to church or crusade, I'd feel like a pretender. How could a loving God allow the man that had meant the most to me as a mentor, besides my dad that is, to be taken away? It wasn't fair. I'm so glad now that I never let either of my grandparents know how hard this was for me, because it would have broken their hearts.

In august, we moved into the dorms. Let's just say Dan was right. I did lose sight of my Savior. Not that I was a horrible kid, let's not get that wrong. But I did rebel against my values. I went clubbing (once, but that was enough for me), went to a couple parties, dressed up and went partying for halloween, had my first smoke (cigar, and once again, that was enough for me), and went to some shows that I regret now. I never drunk alcohol at school (occasionally I'll have a glass of wine if I'm at my roommate's house or something (she's french)), but I was still straying from what I believed. My morals were loosening as well. I started questioning whether things I knew were wrong were actually wrong. And my grades did start to drop. Not horribly, but more than they needed to.

Around late October, Dan was starting to get worse. We didn't know how much longer he would be with us. So one weekend when I was home, and mom was up there, Dad and I decided that, per my suggestion, I needed to go up there for that day, too. I needed to tell my granddad goodbye. That was the last time I saw Dan alive. Even then, I could see how much he and barbara loved each other. Mom was there when Dan died on November 24th. I can remember getting the phone call, and just going outside to my private place on campus and crying. Dan's funeral wasn't until the 11th of december, one month before my 19th. There were several people who talked and stuff, but John Arvelo, my granddad's best friend and mentor, sticks out most in my mind. John's another one of those guys that I respect like Dan, so I'm so glad he's around.

It took until halfway through the spring semester for me to actually realize that I was an idiot and was rebelling. And things changed then. I'm now an English and History double major with an education licensure. Law school...may be in my future, may not be. It's up to God.

Friends: Oh, gosh. That's the thing that's probably changed the most in my life. I kinda dropped off the face of the planet from my highschool friends once I hit college. I made my college friends, thought I had made good choices, and was good with that. Until a situation in March and then again in May let me realize who my real friends are. There's a couple at Meredith still. But my real friends are those who have always been there for me. Jess, Lizzie, Sarah, now Kara, Julie...they've been there for me through all this. And I'm so glad to have them as my best friends. I love you guys uber much!

While on the subject of friends, I have to touch on family. My family is amazing. I was sitting in the family room at the farm over thanksgiving, and I realized that we're not cousins anymore. We are siblings. I trust every single one of my cousins and aunts and uncles with my life. Any problem I have, I'll go to them about. If I need college help, I'll ask Tyler. And I love our relationship. It's one that I know will continue forever. <3!!!

I'm living at home this next year and commuting. After having the freedom that I had, it's a little interesting and difficult to learn to submit again to the will of my parents. Today's lunch was a prime example of that, since I didn't want to eat anything that was fixed, and I had to since I'm living home now. But I'm relearning again.

In other news, I've got Lizzie, Sarah, and Kara's voice recital tonight. Then maybe going to swim on monday, just to say hey since I can't swim right now....because on wednesday, I go in for my second opinion on the torn meniscus in my knee. Yippee. And if I have to have surgery on that thing...well, swimming won't be an option then. Then on friday, Jess is coming over for the weekend while we go to the plethora of Kara, Lizzie, and Sarah's shows that weekend. :P And Sunday is Roberts birthday. (well, monday is, but I won't be there then.) Then the following tuesday, I head up to barbara's for a week to help her move into her new house. :) Busy week!!

Hate crimes

I remember when I was...probably 7 or so, maybe younger, my dad took me to downtown raleigh. Usually, trips to Downtown when I was little meant a learning experience. Because dad works for Durham County government, he would sometimes have to go to the courts in Wake County, and I'd occasionally go with him so I could see what a court case was like, and see how not to act when I got older. Several times, dad took me late at night to see candlelight vigils for people protesting the death penalty the night an execution took place. We'd ride to the capitol if there was a rally going on to see different types of people protesting. But the one experience that most sticks out in my head was when my dad took me to view a KKK rally. Even to this day, I can remember the utter hate I felt as soon as I approached the area. The chants of white supremacy. The white robes, the covered faces. The cross that was burning. The horror of this shocked me. Because I was a history lover, particularly of civil war, I knew what the Klan was. But I had no idea the Klan was as horrifying as it is. I can remember crying after we left, asking dad why someone could hate anyone so much? Why white supremacy mattered to so many people? Why he brought me to see this? And I remember his answer was so that I could be aware there are people like this in real life. History's not just history. It's still alive today. The Klan was originally started to protect the South against reconstruction. But quickly, it changed to being something horrible. I'm all for the confederacy. Heck, I think the South will rise again. But I hate how this image is so associated with the South. And I hate how people can still be racist today. I was looking through bumper stickers on facebook tonight while I had some extra time on my hands, and I came across one that was about the Klan and White supremacy. Yes, on facebook, not even 15 pages into the list. And yes, people had added the sticker. I guess, I don't understand why racism is so prevalent. Closet racism is one thing...but hate crimes? That's taking it to a whole new level. Just some thoughts before I hit the sack.

The random survey

Copied from both Anna and Abigail. :P

One. Have you ever been asked out? yes, I have. Lizzie and Brianna know whom I'm referring to.
Two. Where was your default picture taken? Do I have one on here? The one on facebook was at the fair 2 years ago.
Three. What is your middle name? Elizabeth
Four. Your current relationship status? single
Five. Does your crush like you back? I don't really have a crush. Who came up with that idea anyways?
Six. What is your current mood? Sleepy....and sore.
Seven. What color pants are you wearing? PJ's....black, white, and pink
Eight. What color shirt are you wearing? cream.
Nine. What is your favorite thing to do? read.
Ten. If you could go back in time and change something, would you? No, everything happens for a reason. And changing things might alter the future.
Eleven. If you must be an animal for one day, what would you be? A dolphin.
Twelve. Ever had a near death experience? Yeah. I was deathly sick when I was 3.
thirteen. Something you do a lot? listen to music and talk.
Fourteen. What do you want to be when you get older? a Mom. And a teacher.
Fifteen. Who did you copy and paste this from? Anna and Abigail.
Sixteen. Name someone with the same birthday as you? To name one, Jamie. There's a list I have, though. I have a popular birthday.
Seventeen. When was the last time you cried? today...I pulled my knee out really bad.
Eighteen: What do you consider your theme song? "She's country"
Nineteen. If you could have one super power what would it be? Uh...to be invisible.
Twenty. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite/same sex? Eyes.
Twenty-one. What do you usually order from Starbucks? Grande Peppermint White mocha. Anyone buys me one and they will be my friend for life!! :P
Twenty-two. What's your biggest secret? If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret...
Twenty-three. Favorite color? pink or purple
Twenty-five. Do you still watch kiddy movies or tv shows? YES!! I can't wait until I have kids so I can watch them with them.
Twenty-six. What are you eating or drinking at the moment? peach Izze
What's your favorite smell? Roses, rain, ocean, cologne...the list goes on.
Twenty-nine. Describe your life in one word, what would it be? Blessed.
What is your secret obsession: I'm OCD about my books...that's probably my number one.
Thirty-one. Have you ever kissed in the rain? No
Thirty-two. What are you thinking about right now? like anna, being kissed in the rain!:)
Thirty-three. What should you be doing right now? sleeping.
Thirty-four. Who was the last person that made you upset/angry? hmm...I'm gonna go with the guy at altell who was taking hours.
Thirty-five. Why are you doing this? Because I don't have time to type up an entry and I wanted to post something.
Thirty-six. Do you like working in the yard? Yeah, sometimes
Thirty-seven. If you could have any last name in the world, what would it be? Mine until I get married, then my husbands.
Thirty-eight. Do you act differently around the person you like? I'm going with anna's answer here, because it's true!! no, because I don't just like one person. I like everybody!
Thirty-nine. What is your natural hair color? Blonde, but it's turning brown.
Forty. What did you think about this survey? It's a survey....

On Romance, Summer, and Birthdays

Sarah and Mike's wedding was this weekend. Because my mom was directing the wedding, and I was assisting, I had the wonderful privilege of being able to witness the rehearsal as well as the wedding. They have the love story I dream of. They were friends long before a courtship ever began, so it began on the basis of friendship. Their first kiss was at the alter, and because of the intense love for God first, then each other, you know their marriage will last forever. Their love for each other is in fact a good example of what God's love for us must be like. Everything about the wedding was so relaxed. It all came off perfectly. I love the songs that were sung at the wedding...they all had such significance.

For me, it kind of hit home. Jess posted an entry on her blog that basically described what I was going to say here. So read her entry to get more details on what I'm not elaborating on here. :) But I have also struggled with singleness. If I had been born barely a hundred years ago, I would have been married by now. And if I had been born a hundred years before that, I'd probably have several kids by now. I'm 19...doesn't that mean I should be courted? When I was little, I used to dream that someone I've known forever would come in, sweep me off my feet, and then I'd end up being married as soon as I finished college. But going off to college was a shock for me in a lot of ways. The conversations with the girls often consisted of who everyone was dating, how far they've gone with their boyfriends or even ex's, who still had their v-card, and why everything you do is fine as long as you don't cross the border into sex "until you're ready". Even those who were Christians thought that sex before marriage was acceptable, provided that it was when you were in a serious commitment, such as being engaged.

After this experience, I realized how few people actually think the way we think. Few people are willing to wait for the right man we are supposed to marry. Few people are saving their all for their future partner. And few people, even, understand the concept of courtship. But I'm willing to wait. For the right man, for everything that I want to experience with him, and for the courtship process. God will provide the man at the right time. Granted, that doesn't mean I can just sit down and wait. I'm preparing my life for my future husband, by serving my family and those around me. And if you will all encourage me to do this, that would be amazing. :)

Onto summer. :) It's so weird not being in classes! I'm still not sure if I like it or not. I've missed having stuff to do, but it's true that I did need a downtime. After talking things over with my mom, I've decided that I'm not going to be swimming this summer, but I will be coming to the meets and stuff to cheer you guys on!! :) And I'll be spending 2 weeks in VA helping both of my grandmothers with their respective houses.

Speaking of which, today is Barbara's birthday!! She's always been the best grandma I could ever have wanted. This is her first birthday since Dan died, so I know things are really hard for her today. But she's so sweet, so I wanted to wish Barbara a happy, happy birthday!!! :)

I Keep Coming Back-Josh Gracin

I told myself getting out
That’s what this is all about
Sun goes up, sun goes down
You only get one go around
Then I left this town

Then I let that road carry me
As far as it could carry me
Stood on a mountain free
Found a place where I could breathe, in and out
And thought about things that I can’t live without

Chorus:
I keep coming back
Time after time
No matter where I’m at
I can’t pretend
I’ve found something better than where I’ve been
Cause where I’m from
Is who I am
And no matter how far that I run
Yea I keep coming back

See the more people change
The more that they stay the same
So I just stopped everything
Thought about all the things
Weighing me down
Then I threw out old boxes
Emptied my pockets
Of regrets and love letters
Pictures and lockets

And all I have now
Is the truth that I’ve found
Life has a way
Of just turning around
And around
And around

Chorus:
I keep coming back
Time after time
No matter where I’m at
I can’t pretend
I’ve found something better than where I’ve been
Cause where I’m from
Is who I am
And no matter how far that I run
Yea I keep coming back

To the town on the hill
So peaceful and still
And my memories are at

I keep coming back
Time after time
No matter where I’m at
I can’t pretend
I’ve found something better than where I’ve been
Cause where I’m from
Is who I am
And no matter how far that I run
No matter how far
No matter how far that I run
Yea I keep coming back
I keep coming back
I keep coming back